Happy Tuesday

Well today is a really good day.
I found out last night that my baby sister has a boyfriend that I approve of!!!!!!!!!
This is big news people! I am soooooooooooo happy for her.

Also, I had my day 3 bloodwork and ultrasound this morning and even though I haven't heard from my dr. yet I am very excited because there were no cysts!
So now I just have to wait for them to call to tell me what medicine I am supposed to take.

And Ryan got a few hours off this morning so we got to go to lunch together.
That is always a nice treat.

I also heard from my friend Sarah finally! They moved back to Oklahoma a few weeks ago and we haven't been able to get a hold of them but I talked to her today. She said that she watched New Moon twice already, thats what I got her for her birthday since she is my sister vampire lover.

I am thinking maybe I should go get myself a copy. I don't know why I haven't already, I guess its just been too long since I re-read the books so I have lost interest.

But I did rent the True Blood series from Blockbuster since I read the Sookie Stackhouse books.
At first it was really cheesy but after a couple of episodes it got a lot better.

I just got a letter in the mail from my Jenny Leigh, she wrote me a note just to tell me she appreciates my friendship!
What a sweetheart. Between her and Janette I just feel so loved. I don't know how I get such good friends but I am one lucky girl.

I can't wait to come home and help Robin with the wedding stuff, I will be there from April 10th-17th. I am looking forward to cake tasting and music picking and all sorts of good stuff. And seeing my fam of course.

Okay well Ryan is home, time to pull myself away from the computer.

Well, it's been a while.

I have certainly been slacking on my blogging but as we all know life gets busy.
Ryan starts his blackhawk class tomorrow.
Thank you Army for that 14 hour notice.
Thank God Ryan has been studying because that was just about as late minute as a notice can be.
I talked to my grandparents tonight, I wish I could just move them in with me.
That way I could take care of them and they wouldn't have to worry about their house or neighbors.

Maybe if we get stationed in Hawaii they will come stay with us for an extended vacation.
Ryan and I are both really excited to get his orders, they should be coming here in the next few weeks.
We will probably be out of here in July and off to our next adventure.
I will miss our friends here but I will not miss the location too much.
Or the gigantic cockroaches. Seriously, they blow my mind.

I am going to be planning my trip home in April tonight with Robin.
We have so much fun wedding stuff to get done, it going to be really awesome.
Tasting cakes, checking out flowers, getting her dress, etc.
Unfortunately, there was a little mix up with the bridal shop and my dress won't make it in time but if that is the worst problem we face, then we are doing pretty good.

I have been reading the Sookie Stackhouse series lately and I am really liking it.
It is like a more grown up version of all the other vampire book series I have read.
Plus the font is really tiny so there is lots to read.
I just love being in the middle of a book series, it makes me feel like I am just meeting a new group of friends.
But then when the series is over I feel at a loss, like I will never hear from those friends again.
Yep, I am a weird one.

Ryan is already in bed, I had forgotten what it was like for flight school to be back in session.
Pretty much won't be seeing much of him for a few months :(

Ryan has been sick..

Since Sunday night, I think he must have gotten the virus that our friend Kari had the weekend before because the symptoms were all the same. I have only ever seen him really sick one other time so it was a bit odd. I am usually the one that is sick, I am pretty much a pro at it.
Luckily, we already had an appointment for him at medical so he was seen right away and they gave him a shot of something and three bottles of pills.
I have been trying to force feed him but he really isn't taking too kindly to it.
Jello seems to be all he wants.

I used my new Wii workout game for the first time yesterday and I woke up this morning and thought I was paralyzed.
It's awesome, I can't wait to do it again tomorrow. It is just like going to classes on post.

Yep speaking of, my arms are killing me just typing.
I will finish this later.

Cool website

I don't know if anyone that reads this is into reading.
But I found this website that I visit a lot.
http://www.librarything.com/
I love it because it allows me to keep all of the books I have read in one place.
AND it uses the books I've read to make suggestions for other books I might like.
Anyway, I know I am a big nerd but I think the site is cool.
My username is "littlemurr".

Sad day

Well, I got up this morning and went to Micah's graduation/winging.
It was a really nice production, the speaker was a Brigadier General who graduated flight school 30 years ago.
Apparently his best friend from his years at the Citadel has a son who graduated today.
So as a courtesy the general came to be the guest speaker.
It was not the best speech I have ever heard but the man spoke with sincerity.
I felt like each time he told the graduates how proud he was that they chose to serve their country that he meant it.
It was really touching.
It was really funny cause he called all soldiers who aren't aviators "unskilled laborers".
I am not sure that it was entirely appropriate but it got a lot of laughs.

After graduation I got a text from Janette saying that Neal's father had passed away.
I know that I never met him but I feel the loss of a great man.
I may not have been fortunate enough to spend time with Randy but I did spend time with Neal.
And Neal is a great man, and great men are the result of great mentors.
So therefore, I feel secure in saying that Randy was a great man.
I wish there was something I could do to help the McAtees, I cannot even fathom the pain they must be feeling.

I also had to say my last good bye to Sarah, Micah and the boys.
They are absolutely the best neighbors I have ever had and some of the closest friends weve made.
I hate losing my friends but the one positive is that at least they live in Oklahoma so we can visit them when we make trips home.

Ryan gets home from his funeral detail tonight.
I will be very glad to have him back.
This house creeps me out at night.

I feel like a negative nancy

But when it comes time to update my blog my heart is always heavy.
I found out yesterday that Neal's (who was the best man at our wedding) dad was in a motorcycle accident and has been in a coma since then.
I am not sure of all the details but I do know that Neal and his family must be devastated.
I know that miracles can happen and I hope that their family receives one.
I have been trying to wrap my head around such a tragedy and its like my brain can't compute it.
It's difficult for me to understand how everything can be fine one minute and fall apart the next.

Speaking of, Ryan is on a funeral detail in Pensacola right now.
Not sure of the details but I know that it's a PFC that died overseas.
I don't know how to boys are able to keep it together for those funerals.
I would not be able to keep from breaking down even if I never met the person.

Sarah, Micah and the boys are staying at our house right now.
Micah's graduation is Wednesday and the moved out of post housing yesterday.
So at least I'm not alone while Ryan is away.
This house really freaks me out when he is gone.
It is nice to have lots of noise in the house, I can't wait until we have little ones making all sorts of noise.

This weekend a good friend of mine got food poisoning or possibly a stomach virus while her hubby was away on a funeral.
We ended up going over there at midnight on Friday and staying until Saturday night.
I have never seen someone as sick as she was, and there was really nothing I could do to help her.
Just one of those things that has to pass through your system I guess.
But I got to spend lots of time with baby Clara.
I had no idea how much babies eat. That little girl can put food away like its her job.
It was really cool to get to take care of her, with instructions from mommy, of course.
I was so worn out when we left, for a child that can't walk she sure can take the energy out of you.
I think it was because I was constantly aware of her, if not she would be into something she shouldn't be.

On a positive side, Ryan bought me an iphone.

Alright, I'm off to start a new book series.

In the wake of my breakdown.

So, I am sure that I worried some of you guys yesterday with my vague ovary hating post and my blatant refusal to answer questions.
I am sorry about that but it was just one of those days and I knew if I tried to talk about it I would just end up being a blabbering mess of sniffles and tears.
So anyway, here is the scoop.
As you know, last month I had a laparoscopy done and the only thing that was found was a little scar tissue that was then removed.
So all of my doctors agreed that everything both inside and outside of my uterus/ovaries looked good.
All that was left to do was wait for my next period.
So that time of the month comes and surprise, surprise no period.
So the Dr. gave me some pills to take for 10 days that would trick my body into starting.
And that worked. On Monday I started.
So I called my Dr. and he ordered four different medicines and had them shipped to my house to arrive by Wednesday.
Wednesday was my "day 3".
In the fertility world, day 3 is a big day.
It's the day you go in for bloodwork and an ultrasound and the official start of your medication cycle.
I like this day a lot because I get to start getting shots and taking medicine which makes me feel like I am actually doing something.
Anyway, after Decembers failed insemination, the Dr and I agreed to increase the meds and to add some more.
So I go in Wednesday morning for my bloodwork and ultrasound and I am so excited because everything is just coming together so well.
Ryan is on a hold so he will be able to attend all of my appointments and we don't have to stress about him having to miss school to do the insemination.
Then to top it off with a cherry, I get my very favorite ultrasound tech, Cybil.
She is awesome because she always explains what she is seeing and she is honest with me.
So we get to the room and she starts doing the exam and instantly I know something is wrong because its very painful.
She examines my right ovary and sees 28 tiny follicles, which is normal.
Then she goes to my left side and her face drops and I know what she is seeing before she even tells me.
There is a cyst.
She tries to comfort me and tells me that it is a really big one and in her professional opinion my doctor is going to cancel the cycle.
I get dressed again and wander back into the waiting room to get my bloodwork done, I know there is really no reason but some part of me always stays hopeful.
So I head home crying and crawl in bed to wait for my Dr. to call.
At 4 the nurse finally calls to tell me my cycle is officially canceled.
Just like that. All of my hopes that this was going to be the month are gone.
She tells me to start birth control pills this month and we will try next month.
What she doesn't realize is that Ryan is about to start school again and its just not possible to do treatments with him always at school.
So basically, I guess our baby making plans are on hold for a while.
It might sound strange but I would have much rather gotten to do a whole cycle and it not work then to not even get to try.
I am so heartbroken right now.
It just hurts so much.